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The novel 'I am not Esther' is written by Fleur Beale. The central character is Kirby Greenland also known as Esther Pilgrim. She is the central character because the novel is based on the hard time that she has in her life. Kirby has to change her lifestyle and identity. She has to parent her mother, this is the reason why Kirby is very out spoken and speaks her mind. She is used to telling her mother what to do around the house. Although Kirby is going through a hard time in her life she is still kind enough to help others around her with their problems.
Kirby has to change her whole lifestyle and identity. She has to live in a house with many children, which she is not use too. The family are religious and se has to obey their religion. They believed that she was not brought up well because she didn't believe in what they believed. They changed her name from Kirby to Esther. "Am I Esther or am I Kirby? A good question who was I?" This is Kirby talking to her school counsellor confused and lost about who she was. Defining who you are is important; no one should try to take your identity away from you. The Pilgrim's have a Rule in their religion, which they obey and Kirby has to obey this Rule too. "We do not have a radio or a newspaper, we keep our thoughts turned to the lord." Aunt Naomi explaining 'The Rule' to Kirby. The Pilgrims believe that there should not be any distractions from the lord they should only be focussing on the lord.
Kirby is a very open person and speaks her mind. All her life she has been parenting her mother organising the food and paying the bills for her. Kirby is used to doing what she wants. When she gets told what to do in the Pilgrim house she doesn't like this and disobeys their beliefs. She was sick of wearing her hair in a plait. "Kirby howled and hacked at her hair. I felt the hair on my head frizz out into a wild halo." Kirby refuses to wear her hair in a plait any longer. When her hair frizzes out into a wild halo this is a symbol that she is not bad, she can be an angel. A wild angel into born to go by the beliefs of the Pilgrim's religion.
Although Kirby is experiencing a tough patch in her life with the changes and he mother leaving her all of a sudden she was still kind and helpful enough to help Maggie and Aunt Naomi. Maggie is a young little girl that has just lost a sister around the same age as Kirby called Miriam. Maggie has been told that she is dead but really she has been kicked out of the house for disobeying the lord. Kirby and Maggie become good friends and look out for each other. When Kirby goes to leave to find her mother Maggie asks in a sad voice "Why are you leaving? Don't leave me!" Maggie doesn't want to be traumatised again like she was when Miriam left her. She is scared that she will loose Kirby too. When Aunt Naomi becomes very ill because of her pregnancy Uncle Caleb doesn't pay much attention to her because her thinks that god will get her through the hard patches she experiences. If it weren't for Kirby Aunt Naomi and the baby may not have survived.
Kirby found it very hard having to live with a family she had never meet before. It was hard for her because they believed in a different religion and she had to learn to obey it. Being out spoken and doing what she wanted around the house also changed for her she had to obey Uncle Caleb and Aunt Naomi. She had to form new relationships with others but managed well and helped them with their problems too. This experience was hard for Kirby and would be hard for anyone who experienced this.
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